It is amazing how many times over the last couple of weeks God has brought to my attention the story of Abraham. Abraham was prepared to let go of both of his sons, Ishmael and Isaac. I can only imagine that one night before Abraham walked Isaac up that mountain prepared to sacrifice him. I think it's probably a safe bet that Father Abraham didn't sleep much that night, but rather he probably wrestled with God regarding God's promise of Isaac. Abraham also probably had many more nights of wrestling and wondering before and after Ishmael left his home. But God was gracious enough to give Abraham assurance that He still held a promise for Ishmael and later on in Genesis 21, we see that God sent an angel to help provide for Ishmael and his mother.
These accounts from the life of Abraham kept popping up and honestly one morning I had had enough. I went running and I guess I was trying to run from God's reminders to be prepared to say goodbye to sweet baby B. But I know I can't run from God, and along the way I grew thankful for His comfort given from His word.
I am comforted that God provided for both Ishmael and Isaac. Yes, Abraham had to say give up Ishmael, but God did not give up on Ishmael. Although Abraham was prepared to sacrifice Isaac, God provided a ram so that Isaac could live. I still may not be sure if baby B will be one we say goodbye to or if God will step in right at the perfect moment and allow him to stay with us, but I do know that God was in control of both situations and took care of both boys. Just like He will take care of our baby boy.
Adoption day
Friday, March 22, 2013
Friday, March 08, 2013
Positions
Due to both nature and nurture, I am a sports fan. I am probably passing this down to the kids as we are involved in numerous sports and teams. Some of my friends may see this as a waste of time or something that lacks any spiritual depth, but I have to disagree. Maybe because I can speak the sports language, I refer to the field or court a lot when discussing spiritual things with the kids.
Just this past weekend, I was thinking a lot about positions on the soccer field. Both kids play soccer and are learning the importance of playing and sticking to your assigned position. This has been tough for Kailee because this season her team has lost some players and is sharing a couple players with another team. So in practice Kailee is playing one position (striker), but in the games she is not playing striker; she is playing various other positions. This has led to numerous times when the coach is yelling for her to get back in position, her current position-not the one she is comfortable playing.
Benjamin also has a position he is most comfortable playing. His comfort level is not based on practice time, however. He simply wants to play defense because he is worried the other team will score if he is not back there to help defend his goal. We have talked to Benjamin about his need to be flexible and play the position that helps his team the most, rather than the one he really wants to play.
This got me to thinking about positions and where God places us. Often God seems to put us in positions where we may not be the most comfortable. Whether it is due to having more experience in certain areas or being fearful of situations, we all have a place we would rather God not place us because we just won't be comfortable there. We think it might be too much work, or it may demand too much of us. We are afraid we might fail, so we don't even want to try. But God knows what is best for His team, and we need to think in terms of His team rather than what is best for me. I know that the position God might place our family in, the loss of another foster child, is not one we are comfortable with. However, God can give us His comfort and His peace and somehow use this position to grow us into better team members as we press on in this "game" in which He has already won the victory for us!
Just this past weekend, I was thinking a lot about positions on the soccer field. Both kids play soccer and are learning the importance of playing and sticking to your assigned position. This has been tough for Kailee because this season her team has lost some players and is sharing a couple players with another team. So in practice Kailee is playing one position (striker), but in the games she is not playing striker; she is playing various other positions. This has led to numerous times when the coach is yelling for her to get back in position, her current position-not the one she is comfortable playing.
Benjamin also has a position he is most comfortable playing. His comfort level is not based on practice time, however. He simply wants to play defense because he is worried the other team will score if he is not back there to help defend his goal. We have talked to Benjamin about his need to be flexible and play the position that helps his team the most, rather than the one he really wants to play.
This got me to thinking about positions and where God places us. Often God seems to put us in positions where we may not be the most comfortable. Whether it is due to having more experience in certain areas or being fearful of situations, we all have a place we would rather God not place us because we just won't be comfortable there. We think it might be too much work, or it may demand too much of us. We are afraid we might fail, so we don't even want to try. But God knows what is best for His team, and we need to think in terms of His team rather than what is best for me. I know that the position God might place our family in, the loss of another foster child, is not one we are comfortable with. However, God can give us His comfort and His peace and somehow use this position to grow us into better team members as we press on in this "game" in which He has already won the victory for us!
Wednesday, March 06, 2013
Mornings and Music
Lest you think I am falling apart over here, I can reassure you that I am not. I am experiencing that peace of God that passes understanding because the situation is still the same - waiting mode. But two small things are making big differences.
First, my mornings are getting a makeover. I am not a morning person and can easily sleep in until noon. I have also passed on this gift to Kailee. But lately I've felt that maybe it's not so much of a gift as I thought since I'm sleeping a lot of my time away; time that is quiet and undisturbed. So I began reading and following the advice in Early to Rise by Andy Traub. So far, it is making a huge impact on my day and my attitude throughout. I don't feel like I start off the day already behind and I am having wonderful time in the mornings with God that gives me the greatest jumpstart to whatever our day holds.
Second, our music has also been upgraded. Air One radio is now on in the Metroplex, and the kids and I are enjoying the upbeat tempo and upbeat message. Turning off the political talk (my usual go to station) and turning on music that is constantly helping me fix my eyes on Jesus has helped me sense God's peace throughout the day.
Now that my two commercials are done, I have to share what God showed me this morning. I am reading through Exodus and using The Message Bible to change it up. In Exodus 6 Moses is peppering God with excuses and questions as to why he certainly could not be God's man to lead the Israelites out of slavery. Sounds a lot like me and all my questions and excuses to God about how He should not allow this baby to leave our home. Verse 30 states that Moses said, "Look at me," when explaining to God how he was not cut out for God's plan. But then in the next verse (Exodus 7:1), God replies with "Look at me," and all that He could and would do despite Moses and his hangups. So instead of looking at myself and my situation and all the questions and concerns I have about it, I need to keep looking to God and who He is and what He can and will do to work out His perfect plan for our family, including baby. My new mornings and music are helping me Look at Him even more.
First, my mornings are getting a makeover. I am not a morning person and can easily sleep in until noon. I have also passed on this gift to Kailee. But lately I've felt that maybe it's not so much of a gift as I thought since I'm sleeping a lot of my time away; time that is quiet and undisturbed. So I began reading and following the advice in Early to Rise by Andy Traub. So far, it is making a huge impact on my day and my attitude throughout. I don't feel like I start off the day already behind and I am having wonderful time in the mornings with God that gives me the greatest jumpstart to whatever our day holds.
Second, our music has also been upgraded. Air One radio is now on in the Metroplex, and the kids and I are enjoying the upbeat tempo and upbeat message. Turning off the political talk (my usual go to station) and turning on music that is constantly helping me fix my eyes on Jesus has helped me sense God's peace throughout the day.
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